My goodness! This is REALLY starting to get under my skin/on my nerves. My future mother-in-law, whenever I mention anything about the wedding planning process, always seems to harp on the cost of things, and how I need to keep in mind the cost of this or that. I'm sorry, but I really don't think I need reminding of that every time I mention anything about the wedding. I have tried several times to be nice and let her feel included in the planning process, and each time, she has sought to remind me to think about the expenses, like I have no common sense and have not thought it through. I can promise you I have thought about it more than you think. Anywho. Like, tonight... She was downstairs with me and my SO, and they were tending to some business. As she started to leave, I thought to show her what I had been working on today down here on my time off from work (I got off at 1 PM today! YAY! :D). I had formulated a rough draft of a guest list, which currently contains about 130 people. I clearly told her that I did not plan to invite everyone on the list, but that is just the people that we came up with to invite. I wanted to share with her that I was sad that I wouldn't be able to invite everyone I wanted to and such, but at the same time, at least we're getting work done still, you know? She started telling me that it was too many people, and that I need to consider the cost of stuff like that, especially since one of the places I am going to check out only includes 40 people in the reception meal costs; each person over that will be an extra 10 dollars. Okay, so... Like I don't know I have limited funds. I had JUST finished explaining how sad I was that I would not be able to invite everyone we had listed down, when she began spurting out all these facts that I already knew like I was a child who didn't know any better. I know she didn't mean to come off sounding like a parade-rainer, but she did. She does that often, and it gets a little depressing. I felt so bad saying this to my mom when she asked about me possibly inviting his mom to go with me to look at the places I had found to consider, but I basically told her I wouldn't feel comfortable taking her, because I know she'd harp on the price of everything and how much we couldn't afford it and such if she went with me, instead of just going along with me and enjoying the ride, so to speak... Instead of just having fun with me and trying to help me figure out ways to make it work. You know? So, no, I don't want to take her with me to much involving the wedding. It kills me... I feel so mean. But I don't want to take a Debbie-Downer with me when I'm doing things regarding the wedding. I'm enough of that on my own. haha. :) I know I won't be able to afford anything really nice. However, I will do the best with what I can afford, or try to at least. So, please, quit constantly reminding me of how much we can't afford right now. *sigh* :( I wish I could tell her this, but I have no idea of how to talk with her without seeming mean or like I don't want her involved at all. I just wish she wouldn't constantly remind me "...You don't have enough for that. You'll have to shorten that guest list so much" and such. I know this. I had JUST got done telling you that it was a list only of people we WANTED to invite, and the fact that we won't invite them all. We will form a list of people to invite first, and a list of secondaries for in case the firsts can't come for whatever reason. And the fact that there are some people I listed that I realized won't be able to come anyways (such as my friends who are headed over seas with the IMB this year). I just really wish I had someone to talk wedding-stuff with who wouldn't always remind me of the negatives, but would just be there to talk me through stuff and help offer ideas on how to do things in a cost-effective manner. You know? What should I do? Any suggestions?

In that news, and update: I just finished compiling my first guest list for our wedding this year -- and I realized I wanted to invite many more people than I'll be able to if I get either church I will be viewing within a week. n.n; haha (This considering one can only hold 100 people, and that's with some standing!) So, as odd as it may sound, I hope some people reply no so I can invite everyone I want to and still have enough room for everyone! Haha :) ...If not, I may have to create honorary invites to let people know that I wish they could be there, even though there isn't room enough for them. :/ Poo. I didn't think I'd want to invite this many people. Oh well! I'm pretty sure half the friends won't be able to come anyways... So, there may be hope after all! Haha :)

Pray for me through this, you guys! I desperately need to find a job by the end of this month, as my student loans are coming back due then, and I already barely make enough to cover my bills each month working part-time, barely 20 hours a week, for 8.50 an hour. I need either a second part-time job or a full-time job ASAP. Thanks so much! I'm about to start applying for waitressing positions and gas stations and such if I have to. Neither gets paid much, but every little bit helps! *sigh* I'm feeling depressed. n.n; Haha

Poor Ms. Debbie-Downer,
~*Akarui Mitsukai*~
(Haha)

This is crazy! I called the church again today to talk with the wedding planner lady. I found out she has Monday's off. First time I called, she was out of the office, to return later. Second day I called, she was on the phone with someone else. I left a message, name, and number each time. Today when I called, the girl who answered the phone asked me if I'd like to leave my name and a message. This was a different lady from last week's. I informed her that I had already left my name and number and message twice last week and have yet to receive a reply, so I didn't think that was a good idea. I asked her for an ideal time to contact the lady. Found out she will be back in the office tomorrow morning around 11 AM-ish. So, I guess I'll be calling her back AGAIN tomorrow morning. *sigh* I just hope to get in touch with her soon, as I don't have many days off, so I need to plan it early this week to prepare for it next week. We shall see how this progresses! :p

And also, I'm off this Sunday, so I plan to check out that other church this weekend, unless the weather bombs me out again. So, hopefully more plan updates will be coming soon! We shall see...

Say a prayer, please,
~*Akarui Mitsukai*~
:)

Oh wow. I have SO much planning to do! And SO much of it depends on where we end up getting married. Speaking of which, say a prayer! I'm currently in the process of trying to arrange to stop by and see several of the churches next Sat. (Jan. 30th) that we have taken notice of lately. Wish us well and say a prayer. I REALLY need to find the place to be married at soon. Why? Because:
1. It determines how much of a budget I have to work with (based on the cost of the church/facility we use to be wed int).
2. It will help to determine the colors for the wedding party and flowers because I'll have an idea of the color pallet I have to work with from the colors within the church. :)
3. It will determine the date, which in essence will help to determine the honeymoon dates.
4. It will show me how many people I have room to invite. I formed a rough draft of a guest list the other day when I went shopping for wedding dresses with my Aunt Audie. There are around 51 members in my own family whom will be invited. There are around 7 in Jeremy's family that will be invited... So, we're right at 60 people already. That's not including my other bridesmaid (because my maid of honor is family). Me and my Sweetie will be sitting down some time soon to formulate a list of all the people we hope to be able to invite. :)
5. I'm sure there were other things, but I have forgotten. It's SO hard to focus right now. :/ anywho! :)

So, yeah, many plans to make and it all depends on the place pretty much! So, say a prayer for us to be able to find the perfect place to be wed soon! :) And also for me to find the perfect dress. That would be nice too. I have a dress that has the possibility of being perfect, if it had a corset-style back and the off-the-shoulder sleeves like I really like. :) But it's still really pretty. I just hope to find one that screams "the one!"

I am in need of another job ASAP. Say a prayer for that as well, please. :/ 'specially with this wedding to save up for by the end of the year, among everything else. Thank you guys!

Also, say a prayer for my friend's father. That he would be able to get out of bed, sit up and began to walk around because that would help to clear his lungs up, among other things. Ask God for a miracle: to heal her father soon. Thanks so much! And say a prayer for my friend Amy. She's going through a lot dealing with her ex-fiance. Ask God to comfort her and draw her close to Him through this trying time. Thanks a mil! I have a ton of other things, also... But yeah. Pray for these four things right now: God to heal her father, God to draw Amy close to Him, God to reveal a church that He wants me wed at that is beautiful (as well as a decent dress that screams "ME!" and "beautiful!"), and for Him to grant me a job to help pay for everything I need to pay for this year. Thanks a mil again!

With All My Love,
~*Akarui Mitsukai*~

P.S. I'm so looking forward to Monday and Tuesday! I hope to have time in my two days off to begin getting an idea for invitation ideas among other things for the wedding. :) Anyone know of any helpful sites, feel free to leave notice. I also plan to begin to try and piece together a wedding planning binder. Know where I can get any helpful web print outs, let me know. :) Thanks a mil! Love ya! <3

I have been... so, yeah, anything you guys would like to see a blog on? Let me know. I'm looking for ideas. I rarely have a spare moment to think and contemplate things for myself not dealing with the wedding, jobs, and such lately, so yeah... Offer any ideas you'd like to see a blog about! :) Thanks.

<3, ~*Akarui Mitsukai*~

Okay, so, God is good. I have been living up here for nearly half a year now, and I finally have a friend or two in the area. This is great! Speaking of them, though, I am currently in the process of waiting to leave to meet one of said friends for lunch at Pizza Hut. :) Yay. I have been CRAVING pizza lately... If I were pregnant, I could blame that; however, I'm not... So, yeah. I'll just blame my weird cravings then. haha Anywho!

God is so good! Even when I seem to have trouble finding Him, I just trust He is right there with me, working something out. He's been a beautiful artist lately with the sunsets and all. What little I have seen of them, at least. Haha. Poo on the sun setting so early! :p Anyway. But yeah, he has blessed me with an awesome ministry opportunity and a friend all in one stroke. And then he has gifted me with a friend who prays like you wouldn't believe! Speaking of which, be in prayer for said friend's father, that he will become strong/stable enough to be removed from the ventilator that he is currently on. They told her in a recent update that he seems to be growing accustomed to it, and that's never good with old people. So, yeah, pray for a miracle. She really needs one lately, I feel and believe, so, please... Pray. Ask God to provide the father with strength and stability so that they can take him off the ventilator to work with him better. His blood oxygen level needs to rise for that to happen! Thanks so much.

For other said friend, my lunch date for the day, be praying for her and her family... She has a little son and a daughter, as well as a fiance. The fiance isn't such a good person from what little bit I know, but I shall be finding out more today hopefully. I'll update you guys on how to pray as soon as I know. She just needs wisdom and a lot of encouragement, as well as some time to herself. I'm trying to plan out going over there soon to babysit her little boy to give her a chance to sneak away and fall apart for a little bit. Poor thing. She needs to cry, but is trying to be strong for her babies. I love her like a sister, almost, and I've only known her for around two months! Haha. But yeah. She's a sweetie. Pray for her, for God to begin a work in her life and use me to enlighten her on how to have a relationship with Him, and provide us with a way to witness to her fiance (who's already her husband in God's eyes, the way I see it, so it makes the issue all the more important). Thanks!

I will keep you updated on each prayer request! I thank all of you who have been praying for the prayer requests I have had lately. God is at work. I'm trying to find ways to be a servant to Him. I need that. Ministry is my thing. I love having people to minister to. :) Without that, I feel numb almost at times. It sucks. Haha. So, I'm happy right now.

I'm looking for another part-time job or a full-time job, at least. Say a prayer there. I plan on applying to the Hobby Lobby here today. A friend mentioned that they were a Christian organization type thing, so I checked it out, and sure enough, it is a Christian company! And it'd be doing something I love -- getting to be creative and helping others to be such too. :) Anywho. Say a prayer for God to provide me with more income. It will become a necessity after February for me to have it, as I will have my student loans coming back due. Oh boy... And then I also will have a wedding to save for, don't forget! Haha. Anywho. So, yeah, say a prayer. :p I'm trying to save for it all, but at the end of the month, I barely have anything left over to deposit. At least I have started an interest earning account. Yay for that. It's not much, but it's among the best you can get right now, at least! So, yay for that!

I need to be headed out! My phone reminder just went off. I'll check you guys later. Thanks so much for all the prayers! Apart from the stress, things are starting to improve. I'm simply trying to not worry about tomorrow, for as God's word says, "today has enough worries of it's own" kind of thing. :)